I call them names, I belittle them, I tariff them till they bleed, I steal from them, I refuse them aid, I mock their leaders as weak and two-faced, I slap steel and aluminum tariffs on their trade, I demand they pay up for NATO or else I walk away, I trash the Paris Accord and pull out of the Iran deal they made, I threaten to buy Greenland or tariff Denmark into submission, I call Trudeau “Governor” of the 51st state, I insult Macron as “very nasty” and Merkel as done, I berate them for not spending enough while our troops guard their run, I pull troops from Germany and Syria without a word, I cozy up to adversaries while calling allies absurd,
I hit the EU and Canada with surprise trade blows, I complain they freeload on our defense while reaping what we sow, I demand they buy our LNG and farm goods or face the pain, I publicly humiliate them at summits again and again, I freeze or slow aid when it suits my grudge or mood, I lecture them on borders while building walls of attitude… And then I ask them for one little favor, and they refuse, ungrateful bastards.
